Lawyer jokes
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Why is it that New Jersey got all the toxic waste dumps and California got all the lawyers?
New Jersey had first choice.
You're trapped in a room with a tiger, a rattlesnake and a lawyer. You have a gun with two bullets. What should you do?
You shoot the lawyer. Twice.
How can you tell a lawyer is lying?
Other lawyers look interested.
How many lawyers does it take to change a lightbulb?
None, they'd rather keep their clients in the dark.
Lawyer: "Let me give you my honest opinion."
Client: "No, no. I'm paying for professional advice."
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